Life's most important things: well, maybe not donuts.
Hey look, blank space!
Donuts are yummy, go queue for one hour outside donut factory and sink your head into them. Full of sugar and blueberry, your head is sure to be very satisfied and, who knows, your brain cells might start to replicate! (of course, this is called bribing, but your head doesn't need to know that. Mutual benefits shall be kept secret. After all, both parties are happy, who cares about the rest of the world?)
If you don't want to queue for an hour, you can always get the guys to do it. Important Lesson Taught By David, who was at donut factory with his friends forty five minutes before it opened because, quote, "the girls wanted them". And thus they bought half the store down, 160 donuts in total, and he was ever-so-nice to share them with us. So we trotted off to donut heaven for the better part of the first hour with me taking second helpings (blueberry is definitely nicer than strawberry. strawberry has too much of that too-sweet white covering thingum and too little jam) which did not help our debating skills at all, to say the least.
There are certain most important things you learn in life, such as:
- We must always Smile when "giving feedback" to teachers, so that it will not be seen as an Act Of Defiance.
- Walls are Sacred, do not knock them Down for Peacekeeping Ideals.
- Always dust your carpet and Never lift it up, you have no idea what is underneath, scary things which will Haunt You.
- Reverse Psycology dictates that The More You Fart, The More Others Will Want To Be Near You. And also, The More You Hate, The More You Are Loved. Third, The Smaller You Are, The Bigger You Get (hey, no one learns science? dude, people are all interested in the small things! cells and atoms, what fun! MAGNIFY MAGNIFY and see them explode!)
- When choosing between Religion and Life, choose Religion. You die eventually anyway, but your god decides where you go after death. (therefore, if you are a johamas witness or whatever, you SHOULDN'T choose surgery. your god will condemn you forever after.)
- Wars are Acts Of Diplomacy, they serve to Pacify whatever Conflicts you have with the other country by combining them into one huge one.
- Contrary to Popular Belief, obstacles do not lead to one huge block of Success. Obstacles are there for you to stumble over and realize that your entire life is a failure. If ever you see success at the end of the road, you realize it's a pebble for you to hurl somewhere else.
- Somewhere between Love and Hate is an ant for you to squash on.
The weather's being particularly detestable lately and behaving like a bitter old lady, we should all wack it with hydrochloric acid to neutralize it.
Upside down, right side up, who can tell what's what?
Insensitive comments are only made insensitive because they do not have the sense of touch. This is inevitable because they are Non Living Things.
Escapism is a subset of philosophy; both deny reality. And also, sweetness never lasts, that's cause you might get diabetes.
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far and wee
you and i together mysteriously and always floating
Friday, February 2
2:24 AM
