Why I rock
Now, i am going to come out with a list of WHY I ROCK so that I will think that I am superior and thus the QUEEN OF THE WORLD.
The rest of you are just inferior little people. MUHAHA.
Why I Rock 1) Because I do. (:
I think this list only needs one reason. FINE I SHALL ADD MORE.
2) Because I am the greatest alien of all, and everyone knows that aliens are naturally better than humans.
3) Because I am smart and intelligent and clever. (i know, i know. *waves hand around*)
4) Because I am so NICE. (RIGHT? *eyes rove around and threaten to KILL anyone who dares to say the opposite. and yes, looks can kill... at least, MY looks can*)
5) Because you will never know someone like me! (and you all know that)
6) Because I RULE.
Yay. Are six reasons enough?
7) Simply, Because.
DONE. From this list, you can tell why I rock. There is no reason, I repeat, NO REASON at all to disagree, simply because it is a fact, and an universally recognized one at that.
Actually, you know what I am supposed to be doing right now, at this very moment? ANNOTATING POEMS. Simply because dear 310, being the very hardworking class that they are (*glares*),
with the exception of two people, have all annotated
all their war poetry. This has incurred a comparison mentally in a certain someone's mind, resulting in the conclusion that we are the sloppiest class she has.
Truthfully, we love the certain someone too. Really.
The feeling's mutual, I assure you.
But after looking at all the poems there, and deciding that it is impossible to finish annotating all the poems, I gave up, came online, and thus you see this nice little blog entry here. Joy says I don't blog enough though I blog practically every day, so obviously either my writing rocks or Joy has a screwed sense of time. I think it can be both.
ANYWAY. Since I'm ruling the world, I am dealing with huge matters like poverty, and thus cannot afford to do such mundane things like annotating. MUHAHA.
Today was total defence day, and the school went to take drastic measures to torture us by
cutting the electricity for half of the school day. NOOOOOOO!
No aircons, no fans, no lights for three hours!
We had lessons in the dark, and I must say, it is nicer to view your bunsen burner flame in the dark. It's this bright luminous blusish flame that hypmotises you if you stare at it hard enough. Too bad nobody stared at it hard enough, or I would have gotten to know their
deep, dark secrets. HEH HEH. *evil laugh*
THEN ELECTRICAL BOMB HUNT. We were supposed to locate the electrical bomb that was causing the blackout for maths so that our electricity would come on. MUHAHA. The entire school should thank us; we found the bomb and detonated it for them! THUS THEY HAD THEIR ELECTRICITY BACK! Otherwise they would be suffering for sooooo long!
I think the canteen was supposed to be closed, since Mrs michelle ng told us so, and we even had free biscuits and water provided by the school. But apparently it wasn't, so recess was spent as per normal, except that I found out that the lack of light in the canteen can cause me to lose my appetite.
OH HOLY LIGHT! OH HOLY FANS! OH HOLY AIR CONNNN!
And CLE lesson today was really hilarious! Ms ang was teaching us how to
defend ourselves against attackers! 1) Talk about yourself
"Hi, I AM ZHIXIN! I am nobody, who are you? Are you a nobody too? NAH I'M ACTUALLY AN ALIEN! Bet you didn't know that right? I have special powers! MUHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA!"
Actually, if possible, you should tell your attacker of all the diseases you have, or make them up.
"I know, it's very sad. I suspect I might have Sars or something... I've been having muscle aches and high fever all day. Are you sure you want to take my wallet? I am pretty sure I sniffed a few times on it... it has all my nice mucas! Containig all those cute little germs! Don't you think germs are so CUTE?"
2) Attack
in between the attacker's legs If possible, if you have an umbrella, poke it at
that part.
3) Bash the attacker with anything you have.
4) AIM YOUR FINGERS AND JAB THEM AT HIS EYES
And to that, I have only one comment:
ewwww. Imagine all the... squishy stuff you'll feel.
5) Use your high heels if you are wearing them. STEP HIS FOOT, or bash his face with them. Apparently, if you're wearing flat heels and you stamp hard enough, they can exert up to three-quarters of a ton of weight. Wow.
6) PULL HIS HAIR. This is especially applicable if the attacker is so stupid he grew long hair.
Of course, if you have long hair, it is to your disadvantage. HA HA.
AND A LOT MORE. Of course, the best solution is to TALK YOUR WAY OUT, since your attacker is likely to be not as stupid as you think he is, and is possibly a lot bigger than you with a weapon prepared.
AND I WON'T EVER SURRENDER MY BOYFRIEND, ARE YOU MAD? I'll rather kill the attacker than surrender my boyfriend! THAT IS SUCH A RIDDICULOUS SUGGESTION.
My boyfriend, if you wish, prefers to stay safely in my pocket.
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far and wee
you and i together mysteriously and always floating
Thursday, February 16
12:35 AM
