A recipe to talking to yourself and a nightmare sms
Talking to yourself is simply lovely, especially when you talk it out loud. Relieves stress, you know?
Recipe to talking to yourself out loud1) If you don't want to be accused of being outright insane by your worried mother/siblings/friends and get sent to the mental institution straight away, the best time to do it is... duh, at night. When everyone is asleep, another duh. Talking to yourself is not a socially acceptable thing to do, and thus, in order not to frighten society, we choose 2 to 3 am. This task must be done within this prime time, just like when you are going to rob a house.
2) Suggested place: Kitchen. It is a great place to think, trust me. While you are making yourself a cup of milo (yes, at 2 to 3 am at night), that is the best time to start talking to yourself.
3) Standing by the side of the kitchen table with your legs crossed and a steaming mug of milo in your hands, you should now begin to talk to yourself, using the excuse that you are waiting for your milo to cool down. Proceed to begin.
4) Topics you can talk about are, of course, stuff that have been bothering you lately, or that you've been thinking about. Anything ranging from scientific knowledge to how you would like to mutilate, assassinate or amputate off the limbs of a certain teacher, anything ranging from backstabber friends to idiotic guys whom make you feel like going over and swinging him over and above your head like the headmistress in matilda (miss trunchbull if i recall correctly) is acceptable and highly encouraged. Feel free to dramatise your conversation, or have a split personality if that's what you like. Or if not, you can talk to the spoon or the mug or something.
5) If someone happens to chance upon you (a late night toilet trip, water trip... who cares), you grin toothily, sheepishly, and tell them you've been conversing with the mass murderer of late or perhaps just Santa Claus through the fireplace. Oh wait. You don't have a fireplace. Er, erm... tell them you chased an incessantly talkative robber who was peeking at your window away.
6) Breathe out a sigh of relief once the person goes away, and continue talking to yourself. Studies have proven that this is indeed an effective way to relief the huge burden of stress people nowadays have due to pressure and lack of sleep. See, you yourself is the only person you can trust fully, completely, and what's more, you don't have to explain a whole damn lot! You also do not have to fear that anytime now you're going to receive a blackmail call telling you to give your friend all your money or she will tell the whole world your secret. The best person to talk to, obviously, is yourself!
7) Tell yourself a joke and give a particularly loud snort that will wake the entire family up. They will then realize that their clocks have all stopped in the night and will thank you profusely for waking them up just in time for work and school.
8) Alternatively, you can of course blog about it. That is a socially acceptable thing to do, and you can do it any time of the day.
I received a horrifying sms today from my most dreaded teacher asking me whether I have submitted my application to the Tan kah kee competition, and the answer is rather obvious. I was so terrified I immediately sent an urgent sms to HuiMin.
After a short and fast furry exchange, we decided on the best course to take. Huimin comforts me that it is rather a happy thing to know that if I die, her grave will be next to mine. Now, tell me whether that is cause to rejoice or not.
The ladder was bound for failure anyway, but I felt immensely guilty... A work left undone feels like playing truant. I should have tried to convince Huimin that we should have finished our ladder and do everything we were supposed to do. Instead, the appeal of going home early for two weeks was too great for me to resist...
Gosh. I really, seriously, hope I will still have my life when school reopens.
People, if anyone sees my most dreaded teacher, do give me an extra early alert such that I have enough time to run away before she reaches me.
A guilty conscience never weighs good...
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far and wee
you and i together mysteriously and always floating
Monday, December 19
12:56 AM
