Screwed up life
NOTE: This is NOT a post, according to me at least, as it is just crap.
I am so screwed. My history is so screwed. I'm gonna disappoint everyone including myself. I HATE this feeling of helplessness while I just sit here doing nothing, not knowing what to do to study, to improve my grades.
The worst thing is, I don't really see the importance in them anymore.
Week 6's the exams, now's week 2, 4 and half more weeks to go.
4 and a half more weeks to pluck up my grades.
And perhaps I shall kill myself after week 6. Let's see, what methods are the best? Poison? Lethal injection? Sucking out of carbon dioxide out of the air I breathe in? (NO jumping down the building please, that is SO cliche and painful; no hanging either, that's painful too, and I want a PAINLESS death)
Then you'll never see my again. And then I will never be plauged by earthly troubles again.
Yeah, right. I shall live just to annoy you all.
And I heard that they whip bodies who commit suicide. Eew. My poor earthly body doesn't want to suffer so much just because of trauma from studies, and, basically, my whole entire warped up life.
Looking at my dismal history results, I am so glad I chose trip science and lit.
But then again, my lit results might be worse. Boy.
And so I sit here, doing nothing, and I can't think of anything that can improve my grades. I mean, when it comes to exams, no amount of memorising will get you through. I just realized that. It's all about managing your exam stress or something.
Somehow, everytime I sit for an exam, I get tensed up or something, and then scribble gibberish.
My history answers were warped as one out of my points was always screwed up and that automatically gives me a measley idiotic level 3. Which is so pathetic I could hardly believe it. This is the worst history test I've ever sat for.
And so now, I have only EOIs to save me.
I think this is my slackiest year ever, and this in turn will produce seriously dismal results.
Hear my heart shatter over my history results into a million billion shards, each shard cutting deep into me, see the blood pouring out, taste the mix of my salty tears and that metallic blood, feel my soul getting torn out...
Wait. I don't think all that's worth it for a pathetic history result.
I shall go do my research on my stupid motion which is something about tying develomental aid to human rights. CAN SOMEONE PROVIDE POINTS PLEASE, I'LL KNEEL DOWN ON THE FLOOR AND KISS YOUR BOOTS.
On second thoughts, maybe not.
And another thing... I think you can hate someone just by reading his/her blog even if you don't know that person. Seriously.
Some people are just so... don't know lah. Their style of writing seriously sucks? Or perhaps it's their tone? Makes them sound so ego? immature? bimbotic?
Randomness, but just that I find myself disliking someone though I don't know that person just by reading that someone's blog. And this is seriously uncommon for me, cos I am so nice (really! hee. People are meaner!) and my first impressions are normally neutral.
And I find it REALLY hard to read someone's writing if she keeps adding an extra "i" or something and making the whole spelling of the word different.
Eg: reallie... ii tink hee ish sooo hoott! de odeer guy noot hoot enuff lah.
Or something like that. I can't manage it... i still don't think it looks like what they write, but you roughly get the meaning. It's SO hard to decipher!
Or perhaps I am just retarded. Hee.
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far and wee
you and i together mysteriously and always floating
Tuesday, September 20
12:58 AM
